I don't think I was angry ... but I am ready to accept it if proved

I reached home around 20 minutes back. When my father arrived home at 7:30 pm, he asked me to come with him. My mother too had arrived just then and she knew that we were going out. I asked him "where?" He said "Spencer's". I said I was tired and asked him to go. After thinking for sometime I said that I would go with them.

I never go with him for the monthly shopping of grocery. My mother and brother do. This time I thought I should take some time and I went along. My father said we would be going to Reliance Fresh too. But sadly he took us to some new super market on Sheikpet road, a kilometer away from Reliance Fresh. This store looked small from outside. I told to myself "This thing replacing Spencer's is like Chaarminar replacing Taj Mahal!". But the shop was fine and we got everything we wanted.

From there my father asked me what I would like to eat. I had had a chicken roll just sometime back so I said I was not hungry. He made me walk for sometime and we went to a restaurant, Cinnamon 7. We four had a heavy dinner there. On our way back we saw Reliance Fresh was closing down and we reached home.

I am very tired now. I was in no mood to walk so much and dine outside. After coming home I simply wanted to spend some time on the internet and sleep as early as possible. I had been to Osmania University today to submit my form for re-evaluation of two of my subject subject answer sheets. I felt I deserved better marks in them and I wanted to get those papers re-evaluated.

I was there for more than 2 hours and found no success in submitting them. There we many people and the queue was too long. The counter was supposed to be closed down at 6 pm and I found that it would be waste for me to stand there. I will be going there tomorrow early morning again and I will submit the forms.

All these days six of my friends have been asking me to submit their forms. I was glad I was being asked and I was sincerely willing to do it. Only two of them gave their forms to me. One of them did the work by himself and other three gave it to my friend who was accompanying me to the university. It would be more precise if I say that he was taking me with him on his two-wheeler! Another friend came with us too.

There at OU after we divided the forms amongst ourselves - 13 forms of12 people including us - and waited there for the queue to get smaller. We were told that a person was allowed to submit only one form and that too only his own. But we were ready to do anything and submit them all. A 4:45 pm I felt that even if I wait till the counter gets closed I would be able to submit only one and the one would be definitely mine. But along side I knew that I had taken forms personally from 2 of my friends and that it was my responsibility to submit them. One of these two friends arrived - I called him - and he took charge of his form.

My responsibility reduced to only one form. But I was still ready for some other forms too because those people, though didn't give me the forms, had asked me about it previously. I was willing to submit them. But time was the constraint. If I had waited for my turn to come and if I had submitted my form first, I would definitely not come the next day to submit the rest of the forms. It was already 5 pm and there was no chance that I could stand again in the queue to submit a second form. So, I thought that it would be wise if I come tomorrow and stand in the line for as many times it takes and submit the forms I had with me after distribution - 5 forms.

When I shared this idea of mine - of coming tomorrow and leaving immediately - my friend who took me there got angry. He said we should wait till we submit at least one form. I had the same logic - if I submit one form, it would me mine and I would still have to come the next day, tomorrow - he didn't seem to understand. What looked wisdom to me, appeared foolishness to him. I had told him sometime back that I was ready to wait for any amount of time to submit all the forms. But there was no possibility of all the forms being submitted and I thought I shouldn't waste time there. I had told him that I was free and had lot of time - but that time was for waiting for something to happen, my turn to come, not to stand there and waste.

He even offered to drop me back home if I waited with him till 6 pm. His house is at Chaderghat and mine at Tolichowki. I am not that kind of a person who would like taking such irrational favors. My other friend had his two-wheeler with him and he was going to Tolichowki and I left with him.

But as I was about to leave, my friend who wanted to stay there till 6 pm told me that I was not doing good by leaving. I asked him to explain how it wasn't good. I paused for a second to answer. He was going to answer. I turned around and left.

I was perhaps rude with him. Maybe he was more wise than me. Maybe I should have waited for him just because he is my friend and I have to give him company. Maybe it was ethically right that I had stayed with him till 6 pm just because I came with him. I am still confused. But I am glad I did what I felt was right then and I am happy that I feel glad. I am still trying to know if I was wrong. I am ready to accept this as my mistake if somebody gives me a reason with all his true conscience.

But most importantly, I was irked by something he did just before I was leaving. As I have mentioned earlier, we had distributed the forms amongst ourselves and he had brought forms even from the people who said me that they would be giving the forms to me, but had given it to me. He took one of those forms he brought - which I was holding then - and said that that form was his responsibility and he would submit it. He took from me just that one particular form though there were 2 more with me which he had brought. I obeyed his logic. I gave him those other 2 forms too - I was a little rude with this, I agree.

I would have happily taken the responsibility of those 2 forms, but I was more willing to have the one form which he took from me first. I was angry, I returned the other two too! I was interested in that form because that was one of my very good friend's! He took it from me perhaps for the same reason. I gave him the others two. That allowed me to have just one responsibility. It is worth 100 rupees and if I fail to submit his form - by chance - I will pay him his money and apologize as it would be because of me that a possible rise in his marks would be canceled because.

And now, I sincerely hope that my friend has submitted the 8 forms he had with him when I was leaving or he at least does it tomorrow. He could have shared them with me. He didn't for reasons known only to him. Tomorrow early morning I will leave for OU and I will submit the 2 forms I have.

I neither wish to publicize all this neither would I prefer insulting my friend. He is my friend - if I insult him, I would be insulting myself - a friend insulting his friend is a bad person - always!

I was angry today. Just because he took that single form from me. Maybe I can blame my anger if not me. But if this is my anger, then I am very, very happy that this was my anger. I knew what I was doing then. I was in control of myself. The moment I turned away form him, my talk with my other friend was very nice and on our way back home we spoke on several things unrelated to the forms or anybody related to them. If that was really my anger, I am glad that all it is! I remember shouting at my brother like a mad even till a year back. I have stopped it. I don't remember when I was so angry last.